"I'll be right here..."

"There is only one pretty child in the world, and every mother has it."
~Chinese Proverbs


"The moment a child is born, the mother is also born. She never existed before. The woman existed, but the mother, never. A mother is something absolutely new."
~Rajneesh


I just returned from dropping Mac off at Preschool. He is old enough to attend Kindergarten, but we all collectively thought that he wasn't quite ready. He's a young 5... and maybe I'm not ready to let him go yet. I overheard Madi tell someone the other day, "Mom just doesn't want to be without him." Thanks, Mad.



So he didn't cry... I did. Bawled. A "mom" that I know was dropping off her son as I was approaching my car and she asked me how he did... and I looked up at her with big ol' crocodile tears in my eyes and sobbed! Then, I admitted that he did far better than I did.



So here I am, coffee-blog-kitty at my feet... and lonely.


Which leads me to my title... "I'll be right here..."


All the way to school I explained to Mac that when school is over... that I'd be right there waiting for him. I explained this to him in great detail last night... this morning... in the car... at breakfast, etc... was it him I was trying to convince? Or me?


My Grandmother "Neena" will be 90 on Saturday. She has lived alone since my Papa passed away many years ago. She is an amazing woman whom I admire and love so much. Whenever we visit... or go down with my parents to check on her before she goes to bed... we tell her that we love her and we'll see her tomorrow... or see you soon and in the most peaceful voice she ALWAYS answers... "I'll be right here...."


It's such a comfort to me... knowing that she'll be there. And until this morning I never really thought about those words...


There is comfort in them to almost anyone. The fact of knowing that when you return from wherever you may be going... whether it be Preschool, home for the night, a long trip, college, etc... knowing that the person you love, respect and look up to will "BE RIGHT HERE" when you return.... fills your heart with enough peace to let you walk out that door.


So maybe... it was me who needed to hear Mac say "I'll be right here...." maybe I'm the one full of fear today. I watched Madi go on the bus to Middle School yesterday... without me holding her hand... and I left Mac with his teacher today. Both of them strong and fearless.... me... in the fetal position bawling my eyes out.


So friends... family... "I'll be right here... " always.... and to those who REALLY know me... you can't get rid of me THAT easy!

From the movie ET:

I'll... be... right... here.
~ E.T.

How lucky I am to have something that makes saying goodbye so hard.

~Carol Sobieski and Thomas Meehan, Annie